ryte now whn im writing.
its just so confusing.
bengang.marah.bersalah.
evrythng.
i want to protect the other but at the same time i have to hurt the other one's feeling.
im so sorry.u should be in my place
im a sister.i have my own problems.
please understand.diri sendiri pun aku x mampu nak tolong.
ni kan nak tolong jaga kau orang.
faham lah.if anythg happen to her,
aku yang kena.aku x nk tanggung lagi satu beban if anythg jd dekat die.
kau pun dah besar.tolong lah tolong aku.
u dah besar.i thgt u cn thnk rationally.
ive enough.jiwa kacau.hati resah.
u should have understand.
i thgt i can count at least skit dgn kau.so pls
what ive said to u just now
im so sorry.i didn't mean.
but somehow pls respect me as ur sister.
bile mama x de.i yang kene take the responsibilty.
tolonglah respect aku.
kau nk buat ape2 kat aku.go ahead.kau nk bunuh aku pun aku x kesah
life's nothng fr me skrg.
but pls don't hurt her.tu je.
even aku pun bengang dgn perangai die.but pls ble mama x de.
jgnlah buat hal.
nk gaduh gaduh dgn aku je.
aku pun sakit.kau tahu x?
sakit jiwa hati.pls help me to get through ths.
i guess kau pun nmpk betapa tertekan nya aku skrg.
kalau mata die jadi pape.kau nk tanggung?
kau nk tanggung rase bersalah tu?
kau nk?aku x sanggup.its just a book.kalau pun kau x suke membazir dan syang buku tu.
aku bayar balek.dun wry lah.
jgn samekan harga seorang adik dgn stu buku.
kau dah besar.kau patut faham.
i dont know nk luah dekat sape.
im writing ths just to calm my self down
dgn ditambah dgn masalah hidup yg x penah berkesudahan
susahkan bile orang questioned when u want to chnge.
lebih2 lagi ble org yg paling rapat dgn u.
it makes me feel more down.lgi kurang percaya dgn diri sendiri.
im having that prob.one of them.
i feel lonely.useless.
theres a part of me that doesnt belong to me anymore.
im dying.i want to have all those memories again.
friends.family.
i want to smile like before again.
laughing and do what i want.
its the last thing i do bile i cnnot cntrol myself,
BLOGGING:)
now im feeling much better.at least 1% is enough for me.
im healing myself:)
pray for me.

bye:)